Father’s Day is this weekend. Stop. Don’t even think of how you need to buy him a tie. Or socks. Or a book he’ll never read. Show the dad in your home you love him not with just gifts, but really good gifts.

Here are some ways to show dad how much you appreciate him being in your home:

1. Three words: Bacon in bed
2. Don’t wake him. Doesn’t matter if it’s 4 pm.
3. Five words: Coffee and bacon in bed.
4. Remove Legos from the floor.
5. Charge his iPad before he gets up.
6. Get off his iPad.
7. Abstain from comments about his attire, age, pants size, etc.
8. Place Post-It note on TV remote that reads “your scepter.”
9. Make plans to repeat step 8 tomorrow.
10. Seven words: Remote and coffee and bacon.
11. Do not spill any beverages for an entire day.
12. Do not aggravate mom which in turn will aggravate dad.
13. Clean golf clubs and insert them in vehicle of choice.
14. Remove clubs from the minivan and place in other car so dad can maintain cred at the golf course.
15. Do not ask him for money.
16. Remove children from house for minimum of 30 minutes.
17. Create “daddy do-list” that includes “nap” and “snackage” on it.
18. Ask dad about “glory days” of high school sports.
19. Act like you care about #18 for minimum of 90 seconds.
20. Two words: filet mignon.
21. Make sure The Good Wife does not grace the TV screen at any point during the day.
22. Remove bills from sight for 24 hour period.
23. Two words: 24 marathon.
24. Compliment dad on how great he looks.
25. Avoid laughter upon completion of #24.
26. Tell dad you want to become a doctor. One who goes to med school on scholarship.
27. Do the dishes for mom. Happy wife = Happy life.
28. Fix that thing that only takes 5 minutes to complete that dad was supposed to fix last summer but never did.
29. Three words: Chocolate covered bacon.
30. At 8 pm proclaim it’s “John McClane time!” and proceed to watch whichever Die Hard dad wants.
31. Kiss dad goodnight.
32. Hug him.
33. Tell him that you love him.
34. Thank him for helping make this house a home.
35. Then leave him some bacon for later.

Header image courtesy of BabyBeltz.com