We are certified “Thronies” here at the Coldwell Banker headquarters. So you can count us in as one of the millions of fans feverishly anticipating the season 3 premiere of HBO’s Game of Thrones.
In anticipation of the new season, we’ve gone back and re-watched most of Season 2 and what stuck out most besides the incredibly suspenseful story line is how pristine and beautiful many of the locations look. If you could ignore the assuredly low life span, looming fire-breathing dragon attack, white walker zombies and beheadings; one might even really wish they were living in the world of Game of Thrones.
We’ve already taken a look at “Winterfell Castle”, so let’s go on a tour through my personal favorite home in Game of Thrones: the ‘Red Keep’ located in King’s Landing. There’s a lot to love about this home and location and a whole lot to be wary of too. Let’s take a voyeuristic peak at this massive royal abode to see if we’d ever consider living there.
Exterior – The Red Keep at King’s Landing
Details: The ‘Red Keep’ is an absolutely massive royal castle that sits on the south easternmost point of King’s Landing. Similar to Buckingham Palace, the Red Keep is the rightful home to the King (of the Seven Kingdoms), Joffrey Baratheon along with the rest of his family. In addition to being a royal home, it also serves as a steely fortress to defend the city against power hungry usurpers who want to overthrow the King.
The Good: This architecturally significant marvel is a real trophy home that offers all the space, amenities, wait staff and luxurious comforts you could expect from a mythological fantasy world. As is the case with most castles, the home offers countless underground passages, towers with phenomenal views and top of the line sturdy construction; seeing how canon balls won’t even break through the walls (take that sheet rock!)
The Bad: While it’s great that home’s exterior can withstand canon ball attacks...the home has had to withstand canon ball attacks – enough said! Additionally, this piece of property is so revered throughout the Seven Kingdoms, that multiple parties travel great distances with thousands of men with an eye on kicking the residents out. While the walls help thwart human attackers, there’s no aerial cover to stop dragons from burning it to the ground. Certainly something to think about.
The Great Hall
Details: Possibly the most important room in all the Seven Kingdoms, the Great Hall is home to the “Iron Throne”, the symbol of the King’s power that was built from 1,000 swords that were given to the first unified king of Westeros, Aegon Targaryen (kin to ‘Khaleesi’).
The Good: The gargantuan columns, marble floors and stained glass windows give off an old world charm reminiscent of the Roman Empire. Besides holding a rather unique chair, the large room is more like a banquet hall then an actual room. You’d be able to lavishly entertain your family, throw weddings or terrorize your neighbors by playing “court” inside this lovely space.
The Bad: Exact estimates don’t exist, but I’m guessing the Great Hall clocks in somewhere around 20,000 square feet so it’d cost a pretty penny to get enough furniture to make it really feel like home. I’m a firm believer in karma, and I sure wouldn’t want to spend any time in a room that dubs as a funeral parlor and torture chamber. Also, how practical is a chair made out of pointy swords? Not safe, especially if you have kids.
Tower of the Hand
Details: This lovely tall building is where the ‘Hand of the King’ conducts his official work on behalf of the throne. One of the perks that come with the job are that this gorgeous tower also becomes the exclusive residence for you and your family.
The Good: If you happen to be (un)lucky enough to be the ‘Hand of the King’, you can count on basically zero commute time to work, since you already live in the building with your family. The tower also has a terrace off each room and offers incredible views of Blackwater Bay.
The Bad: The structure itself is sound and really beautiful, but seriously, who wants to live in the same house as their boss? Especially when your boss is a maniacal bloodthirsty teenage king.
Maegor’s Holdfast
Details: Described as “a castle within a castle”, Maegor’s Holdfast is the private wing of the ‘Red Keep’ exclusively for the royal family, down to the King himself. This part of the home is named after Maegor Targaryen, who is purported to be the one who built this home.
The Good: Seeing how the King himself sleeps in this part of the ‘Red Keep’, Maegor’s Holdfast is undoubtedly the most lavish and luxurious part of the home. This section also offers all the security a paranoid homeowner would want. Its got massive surrounding walls with a drawbridge and a moat with iron spikes (sometimes with heads on them) that serve as the ultimate deterrent to would be intruders.
The Bad: Potentially beautiful waterfront vistas are spoiled by 360 degree views of heads on spikes. End of story. Who would ever come visit you?
The Community
Details: The ‘Red Keep’ is located in King’s Landing and is capital of the Seven Kingdoms. This walled city sits on the water, has a population upwards of 500,000 and is said to “be larger than Medieval London or Paris but smaller than Medieval Constantinople or Ancient Rome”
The Good: King’s Landing is like the New York of this fantasy world. You’ve got fantastic views of the water, busy markets and shops selling goods and you can admire the architecture of the skyscrappers whenever you want. Basketball wasn’t invented back then so if you can stomach it, you’d have to settle for bloody jousting tournaments to quench your competitive thirst.
The Bad: Hmm, where to begin. You’ve got a government who can’t feed its residents, a non existent sanitation department and you’ve also got almost every nobleman with a sword willing to level your city at a moment’s notice. Add the whole zombies waking up and fire breathing dragons learning how to fly thing to the equation and we just think from an investment perspective, property values won’t remain high for too long. Oh, and it’s pretty dangerous too.
There you have it! A look at the good and bad aspects of the ‘Red Keep’ – one of the nicest homes from the Game of Thrones! What do you think? Would you trade your comfortable home and modern advances like Facebook and iPhones for an old charming castle on the water? Or would all the politics, famine and mystical creatures keep you away?
Now while it’s pretty unlikely that you’d be able to really live in Game of Thrones, you can create a family “crest” for your “house” like the one below on jointherealm.com. You can’t live in the ‘Red Keep’, but you sure can represent your current “house” in true Game of Thrones fashion!
Game of Thrones premieres this Sunday at 9pm est. on HBO. We’re very excited about the return of the Lannisters, Starks and Targaryens. Will you be watching?
I LOVE this….as a ‘Thronie’ myself, big time, I was fascinated and amused by it all. For you fellow ‘Thronies’ this is a must read.
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Came across this unexpectedly. I see its from 2013…. It is June of 2016 now. This should be a link on all CB sites! It’s engaging, entertaining, and a nice lark away from the trudge that befalls us on home hunting.
You are a clever one me Gonzalez. I hope you have been rewarded for this fantastically well organized and written expose. Very very well done if CB has not valued your talents, you MUST market yourself to other companies interested in consumer engagement and/or become an entertainment writes/blogger, or some other e-commerce marketeer.
We’ll done! Hope I hear of where you are now.
I am not fan of GOT but I have been planning to watch it for quite sometime. Thankfully I came upon your post this is really very informative. I’m happy that I came across this post as it’s like a preview for me and now I know what I am getting into. I can’t wait to get started and be part of the phenomenon.